Breaking Hiatus

Nag-fail ka na din ba sa pag-achieve ng plans and goals mo?

I don’t like making promises, it frustrates me when I can’t keep them.

I consider myself a man of my word. I’d like to think that I am. Pero pagtataksilan ako ng maraming pagkakataon sa nakaraan ko.

I made many commitments in the past which, despite my willingness to keep, I just couldn’t. ‘Yun yung mga pagkakataon na isinasampal sa akin ‘yung katotohanang, “May Diyos!” Madalas sinasabi natin na “may Diyos” kapag may magandang bagay na nangyayari o kapag may himala na naganap. Marami din naman akong ganon sa buhay ko. Pero ‘yung mga times na talagang wala akong kontrol sa mga bagay at nafu-frustrate lang ako at nade-depress pero wala talaga dahil hindi ko kayang i-keep ang commitments, I have to be reminded by God: “Hey, boy! I exist!”

Oo nga pala… hindi nga pala ako Diyos. May Diyos… at hindi ako ‘yun.

And He controls everything. Ako… I can’t.

I got sick last week. Ang dami ko pa namang plano. Ang dami kong gagawin. Ang dami kong backlogs na hahabulin. Ang daming isusulat. All of a sudden, nagkasakit ako. Paggising ko kinabukasan sobrang bigat na ng pakiramdam ko. Maghapon hindi ako makabangon. Gumagapang ako papuntang CR. The whole weekend passed and my head would spin everytime I look on an LED screen for a while so typing and writing was impossible. Only until today. Haay…

Commit to the Lord whatever you do,
    and he will establish your plans.
    ~Proverbs 16:3

Hindi ba ako nag-commit kay Lord ng mga gagawin ko? Baka. But as far as I know, I did. E bakit nagka-ganon? A few verses down in Proverbs 16 lies a good explanation:

In their hearts humans plan their course,
    but the Lord establishes their steps.
    ~Proverbs 16:9

That verse has become a favorite of mine sa dami ng pagkakataon sa buhay ko na hindi nasunod ang mga plano ko. It reminds me that He is the one who establishes my steps. That He is the Lord of my life – the One who establishes me. He leaves me with planning and everything, but whenever it is not according to His Will, He overrides my plans. Medyo habit ni Lord yun sa buhay ko. O baka habit ko lang talaga ang lumiko sa plano Nya at tumahak ng sarili kong landas?

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Times like this remind me of God’s Sovereignty and the need for me to submit to His authority. My life is His, and so He directs my steps. I make the decisions, yes, but He is the wisdom that guides them. And I praise Him that during emergencies when I need to be interrupted, He does interrupt my plans.

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Ikaw, ano’ng mga plano mo ang ininterrupt ni Lord?

May resolution ka na bang nag-fail? Goal na hindi na-achieve?

Times like this, let’s ask God which is the better direction. And I pray we submit to His plan rather than be frustrated in insisting ours.

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